Voicemail

[moreofaponchoguy]

"--just talk into it? Okay, uh, you've reached Cal Kestis and BD-1."

"Hello!"

"Leave a message and I'll... try to figure out how to get back to you."

Comments

[afraid_of_marshmallows]

"Oh, un, hey Cal! And BD! Um, the new schedule has gone up for classes and there are a couple maybe you'd be into? There's one on yoga, which is supposed to help with meditation and another on camping....I've signed up for both of those...and I saw one on cooking and one about coffee...a cool one about exploring Earth...uh, yeah anyway like I said there are a bunch and I thought maybe you'd be curious and want to check them out! I'd be happy to go over them with you if you're not sure what anything means...okay bye. Oh wait, this is Arden by the way. Oh, um, you probably figured that out, right. Okay anyway, bye again."

[moreofaponchoguy]

Cal played the message and smiled at BD. "Sounds like I've got some things to sign up for."

"You should make sure to thank Arden for the message," BD said innocently.

"Oh, yeah, of course. Do you think she'd mind if I signed up for some of the same classes?"

Alas, BD-1 was a small droid, and couldn't shake the crap out of Cal like he wanted to. "No, she won't mind."

[afraid_of_marshmallows]

Hey! There's a spot in town where a cool bird shows up sometime. You mind checking to go see if it's there? It's not very far from the park, actually, close to the bookstore.

Attached is a selfie of Arden with her arm slung around a giant capybara, both of them seeming very pleased.

[afraid_of_marshmallows]

The Waffle House showed back up and a bunch of people from the party are here dying into their plates of hash browns and it's the funniest thing. I would send you a pic if it weren't rude. Also, they might murder my due to flash.

[moreofaponchoguy]

Please don't get murdered before class and dinner. I would be very sad. 😔

Yes, Cal had figured out how to use emoji in text messages. Technology was so cool!

[afraid_of_marshmallows]

But don't you wanna see what Dean looks like crying into a plate of bacon?

[single_man_tear]

At some point during the day a box was left outside Cal's door. It was wrapped in silver and white paper with a giant bow on it. The card read "Congratulations to the happy couple! - DW"

[afraid_of_marshmallows]

Hey. Heard this song and it kinda made me think of you. Hope u like it.

[afraid_of_marshmallows]

OMG OMG OMG NEW 2 FAST 2 FURIOUS MOVIE!!!! MOVIE NITE TONITE midnight!!! IM. PER. A. TIVE!!!!

[doesdoctorstuff]

Yeah, so Navaan had class today, but she wasn't actually following any of the rules, just spinning the wheel and making phone calls. And sometimes not even bothering to spin the wheel.

"Hey so the wheel told me to text somebody and talk real dirty or something, so that's what I'm doing."

That wasn't what the wheel said at all and also this wasn't a text.

"Okay, so the FIRST thing I'm gonna do when we hook up is lay you down and start to lick you from--" The message continued in this vein for roughly three minutes when finally Navaan was like, "Wait. Aren't you the kid I flashed cause you're too little for sex yet? Yeah, don't come trying to get me to change my mind, kiddo, I don't fuck with training wheels. Try a few people out and then you can call me. Okay, bye!"

Followed by an actual text several seconds later. Okay because I feel bad, here's a picture of my tits, you're welcome. So uh. Now you have that on your phone, Cal. Congrats.

[moreofaponchoguy]

So, it took longer than Cal wanted to admit for him to figure out that the little icon that looked like a trash droid could delete a message while it was happening, and even longer for Cal to figure out how to delete the picture, and then really delete the picture, because apparently that was a feature the phone people thought users would want. Ugh, this world.

Wacky Phones 2024

[sith_happened]

From here

I don't know what you're doing with a bikini and painkillers but if I get another call about it, I'm not posting your bail.

Phone day!

[seriesofbaddecisions]

[From here]

Not sure why you're complimenting my butt but yours is pretty good yourself.

Everyone needs a compliment sometimes.

Wacky Phone Day!

[afraid_of_marshmallows]

She hadn't had one of Professor Scientia's classes and didn't recognize his voice, so she could be excused for thinking that his message was just somebody thinking they were funny.

Fandom had probably routed it here because of the island's love of maximum drama.

"Okay, I don't know how many times I have to say this, but we're not dating! We don't like each other like that, we're just friends, okay? So stop trying to turn this into something it's not, goddess."

Re: Wacky Phones 2024

[moreofaponchoguy]

[Went here!]

Re: Phone day!

[moreofaponchoguy]

[Went here!]

Wacky Phone Day!

[slothbabyproductions]

After not hearing back from Arden from her previous text, Kamala sighed and sent a follow up message:

"Look, Arden, I know you keep saying you're just friends but you spend an incredible amount of time talking about Cal's arms. His eyes. How nice he is. It's obvious you like him and have a crush on him. I mean I honestly think he cares a lot about you but is too afraid to admit it. Really the two of you need to get locked in a room and not come out until you both deal with this. Or make out. One of the two."

Clearly Arden was avoiding her texts. Fine. She'd just keep texting until she heard back.

[deathsmajesty]

Liliana was still under the impression that 'flang' was a twee way of referring to sex, so her reply to her most recent message was a bit more explicit than usual. Not much! But some.

Darling, I appreciate the compliment, but I'm over 200 years old. Believe me, I've fucked. Whatever 'introduction' you're offering, no matter how thorough you may think it is, is something I've already had, but better, and with men, women, sapient non-humans with genders you've never even heard of.

Re: Wacky Phone Day!

[moreofaponchoguy]

[Went here!]

[moreofaponchoguy]

[Went over here!]

[ifwebeworthy]

(From here.)

"I know perfectly well that you can toss a tank, and that your dance moves are indeed 'goofy,' just as you know that I am no mere 'fan' of the Avengers. Are you being held hostage? Reply with a message of support for the Yankees if so."

[pocketpretzels]

"I have no idea why he'd discuss it with you, but it is flattering to hear the dean thinks I have integrity."

*a long pause*

"We are speaking of the fellow with the robes, correct?"

Wacky Phone Day!

[drumsticksandd20s]

[From here!]

Oh yeah, the phone system around here was having one of those chaotic neutral days, wasn't it.

"Hey, look, man, that hardcore Mary Shelley capital-R Romantic type shit is definitely not my style, but I'm not going to be out here kinkshaming anyone who's into it. Sorry you got an infodump about someone's balls, though."

Re: Wacky Phone Day!

[moreofaponchoguy]

[Went here!]

[slothbabyproductions]

Dropped off in front of Cal's door was a box with his name on it.

Inside was a batch of delicious chocolate chip cookies (the secret ingredient is nutmeg), a batch of nan khatai cookies,mix mithai and... six pairs of athletic socks.

Along with a note:
Calvin,

We thought you might need a little something to make your day. (Also everyone needs socks) From our family to yours!

Enjoy!

-Muneeba